Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Black Boots of Power

I met a deer who had 3 bodies and 12 legs. He was giving himself and anyone who would listen a pep talk, about how each body had a mind of its own. To get anywhere, he needed to distract his other bodies. So he could never think about what he was doing once he made a decision or else his bodies would know what was going on and rebel.

Nearby, a livestock auction was going on, and a young pig sold for a high price and was very proud, because only show pigs sold that high and it meant he was compellingly handsome.

I went with my father to find the secret house we lived I when I was first born. He showed me some photos he had taken from where my crib had been, and it made me remember old thoughts from when I knew no language nor what anything was. Just mysteries all around, but I didn't know yet how to question or search for knowledge because I didn't know what knowing was.

We found our old house on an Indian reservation, and no one had lived there since we moved away. It looked weathered and old on the outside, but inside it was clean and nice and warm. It was nicer than my mom's current house and she wouldn't have to pay anything to live there, and all her old paintings were still hanging on the walls.  So I was going to ask her if she wanted to move in, but then I stepped back outside and all the Indians were slaughtering sick animals outside. I felt like I understood something about what they were doing instinctually, because of my Indian blood, and it wasn't bad because those animals had to die so they wouldn't suffer or infect others, but I was still scared by it and knew my mom should stay at her own house rather than come here. My dad and brother were busy collecting the animal parts they wanted, and my brother was upset because the eagle wing he had been saving was poorly preserved and it was crackling apart.

I left the old house and had to duck and dodge past all the animal guts. I saw some men flying past above and I pointed out to my brother that one of them had fake legs. He followed them to get a better look and learn their ways.

I moved into a capsule apartment building, and a neighbor had some really badly behaved kids who menaced everyone. I told her that her kids were terrible to all the other people who lived there, so we wanted her to teach them how to empathize and value other people. She promised she would, but in the meantime they were still on the loose, so I caught the attention of a scary spirit man with big metal teeth and sent him to chase the bad kids. He couldn't hurt them but he would scare them every time they thought about scaring someone else.

With that solved, I went back to my apartment. A very beautiful young man, my lover,  was waiting outside. He was gorgeous but very delicate, so much so that all his colors were just tints. His skin was very pale and his hair was sort of silver brown, flashing in the light and very pretty. I tried to kiss him but when I touched him he wasn't solid. When I closed my eyes he was only static.

I told him I would teach him to call on spirits to protect him. He revealed to me that he was only half real, and was half spirit too. I gave him a pair of badass black cowboy boots with spurs and said "That's true for everyone. You're as real as you want to be. These boots will ground you and give you substance in this world, but it's only because they make you feel strong. Remember that it's your attitude and your actions that create you." And with that he put the boots on and became fully solid. His cheeks flushed with vitality, and his hair turned cherry red, and he picked me up and kissed me.